Monday, July 12, 2010

First Job Horrors Turned Hilarity

So we all remember our first job EVER. 

Whether it was intensive labor, borderline easy, or spent sitting on your butt all day, we all still remember those times where we messed up for the first time and regardless of the situation, you FREAKED the crap out. 

This weekend I spent time with my mom, sister and the nieces and somehow we got on the subject of the hilarity of my first job woes and the retelling of the stories made us all hunch over and laugh with tears.

Let me just tell you that this is for your enjoyment. :)

So my first job ever at the tender age of 15 was at a place called the Video Shop (catchy title, I know), which was privately owned and located on Bullfrog Corner (no, I did not make that up...we're in MS people), but listen, we didn't just have videos...oh no, we had videos, tanning AND gifts! The beasts of early age tanning beds were located in the back of the store, and kind of a nuisance if you think about how large the store was. We closed at MIDNIGHT every night, and the tanning beds closed at 11:45.

Now here are two stories that will make you wonder how I didn't get fired:

First Job Mistake #1(time of employment - a few months):
During my first couple of weeks working at the Video Shop, I was basically the cleaning wizz. Cleaning tanning beds, cleaning the video shelves, cleaning the counter tops...I was cleaning everything. And a little thing about tanning beds most everyone would already know are the timers. We had timers located outside of our 30 tanning beds, and when two dots appear it would either mean two things: 1. the bed needs to be cleaned or 2. the bed just shut off. I know you can already tell where my priorities are headed...
So with cleaning solution and several towels in hand, I set out on a quest of cleaning as many tanning beds as possible within 30 minutes time. If I saw two dots outside the door, you better believe I was barging in to clean. And barge in I did...on a half naked man with a very strategically placed towel. 
The next two minutes were more of a blur. All I remember was dropping my supplies, slamming the door, and telling my coworker I was headed to lunch....and squealed tires getting out of there.
Lessons Learned: Lock your doors.

First Job Mistake #2 (time of employment - 6 months):
One lady who tanned at our beloved Video Shop was notorious for coming in and falling asleep in our tanning beds, which resulted in various occurrences of us knocking on the doors to wake her up. One night around 11:30 at night, she came in and wanted to tan. The store was dead besides one other person, and all I could think about was getting home to my bed and wondering how I was going to wake up at 5 in the morning for school the next day. Like normal, my coworker and I locked up the store when everyone left, turned on the alarm, and took my sleepy self home.
I came into work the next day when my boss started asking me some weird questions:

Boss Lady: "Hey Whit. How was close?"
Me: "Oh, you know, the same ole same ole."
Boss Lady: "Did you happen to forget anything? Anything at all?"

Right about that time I was glancing at the glass doors when I noticed very large, sporadic hand prints all over the glass...and that's when I realized...I LOCKED THE SLEEPING TANNING BED LADY IN THE STORE LAST NIGHT.
Apparently when she woke up in the pitch black store, she rose to get out of the bed and triggered our alarm, which called the police, which in turn called my boss to let her out of the store... who lives 45 minutes away.
Lessons Learned: Stay away from late night tanning beds.

So...did I make you feel better about your first job?

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Ins & Outs (#2)

What is IN:

True Blood is Back
Ok, ok, I'm a little late at saying that, but seriously, the whole reason I watch True Blood besides the hot dudes is for the crazy, explicit story lines...and last Sunday's produced one twisted story line. (Somewhat of a pun intended...)

I've been running with Cory for the past couple of weeks now, and I love it. We only do it late at night because of the terrible humidity and heat we have here. Right now we are only doing about 1.5 miles at a time, but hopefully we will progress in the future and have plans on running marathons sometime in the fall season. These are the shoes that I purchased recently due to Love, Belle's recommendation, and I absolutely love them! They are Nike's LunarGlides + and if you are looking for a great running shoe, this would be it.
If I ever miss a show or I'm too lazy to DVR it, I turn to this website. It even has movies, it will play when you are overseas (just in case you are going on a vacation anytime soon), and the best part, it's FREE. Sure it can clutter up with some ads here and there, but it sure beats watching Hulu's sucky selection and Megavideo's lack of letting you watch anything over 57 minutes.

NARS Blush in Super Orgasm
My dear friend, Courtney, gave me this a few weeks ago, and I LOVE it. It's basically NARS Orgasm with glitter (not at all as tacky as it sounds...), but with a quick swip of another brush, the glitter drops away. I love the color, especially when I can be fair skinned one day and spray bronzed the next. It truly is awesome for either skin types. 

 NARS Laguna Bronzer
Another gift from precious Court that is now my favorite bronzer. She swore by this stuff, and now I'm a true believer. I use it to blend my face and neck (which tends to be the hardest spot to self tan) and on the top of my collar bone for a sun kissed finish.

If you love photography and do not have the app on your iPhone yet, buy it now. Seriously, it come quite in handy for making some unique and vintage looking photos. Here are some examples I've taken with it so far.

What is OUT: 

 Cancellations of Shows I Like
If I'm going to get sucked in to waste my time watching shows such as Happy Town or Flash Forward and then you cancel them mid season could AT LEAST finish said show online. Or tell me who the freaking Magic Man is and why everyone fell asleep for 1:40 minutes. I mean...does the internet have ratings too???

Running (in terrible shoes)
Thank the good Lord that I fixed this problem, and STAT!! Shin splints suck, and there is no way around that...

What's been in and out with ya'll?